A Cherokee elder was imparting wisdom to his grandchild, “there are two wolves inside you. One wolf is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offence when no offence was intended. But the other wolf is full of anger and looks for fights. These wolves are in ferocious battle to dominate your spirit.”
Then the grandchild asked, “which one will win?”
“The wolf that you feed,” responded the grandfather.
Modern society has discovered- I’m assuming through medical science- that there is actually a third wolf and if you choose to feed this wolf, you become a furry. *
The seeds were planted when a generation grew up under the influence of Looney Tunes. Although never meant to be a lesson learned, some watched Looney Tunes and realized they didn’t have to be human, they could live life as a humanoid animal instead.
By now, most of us have attended at least one furry convention in our lives and a major issue is evident the moment you step foot in the convention hall. There is a huge lack of minority representation in the furry community. As you look around the room. You’ll see a plethora of fursuits while people show off their fursona but why are the vast majority of furries dog and cat variants? Where are the lemurs, koalas, naked mole rats, sloths, pink fairy armadillos, Chinese water deer, markhor, etc…?
It’s a cat-tastrophe. Furry halls have become congregations of cats, lion, tigers, wolves, dogs, coyotes, foxes and so on. This feline/ canine regime has created such a tight stranglehold on the furry community one wonders if there is an underground furry movement of disenfranchised minority fursonas ready to explode out into the open at any moment. Think Bolshevik rebellion but with hippos, platypus, axolotl and an aye aye leading the charge. Through carnage, bloodshed and anarchy it will truly rain cats and dogs freeing the minority fursonas from the elite 1%. The horror of such a civil war gives us paws.
As one of the smaller giants in the U.S. media network, I Hope This Is News can only speculate how this tidal wave of fur and claw will sweep the nation. Will sports mascots be forced to pick a side or will they all be ostracized as fleshy human sympathizers?
It is our opinion there is only man who can arbitrate peace. A god actually, who can unite the entire furry kingdom. Zeus. Oddly enough, he has not been seen often at recent furry conventions however it is well known that Zeus was one of the original animal lovers. One of his fondest hobbies was turning into various species and yiffing his way through the animal kingdom. Some say he had an uncanny ability to light that romantic spark with his lightning bolt.
One wonders if the minority furries will find their John Brown and raid their own Harper’s Ferry. To reiterate the wisdom of the Cherokee, we fleshy humans can only hope the furry community doesn’t go barking up the wrong tree and feed the wolf of rage. That would not be purrfect for any of us.
*No Cherokee were consulted in regards to this third wolf scenario, we are relying on the credibility of the ignorant white man