In 1953 Ray Bradbury published the book Fahrenheit 451. To this day it is still taught in classrooms across the United States however it has been misinterpreted for decades. Fahrenheit 451 is taught as a lesson against totalitarian governments similar to the messages of George Orwell’s 1984. This was never the message Ray Bradbury sought to disseminate. His purpose was to demonstrate television’s corruption with the example of Montag’s wife ignoring him as he goes through major life revelations. An artist’s greatest curse is misinterpretation. Which brings us to Enrique Iglesias’ Hero.

In 2001, Hero swept the world as a romantic serenade about taking care of the person you love. However, based on my own musings at 3 in the morning this is not what Enrique’s true intent. Hero was never supposed to be a term about protecting or caring for someone. In fact, Enrique was using the word hero to describe a sub or sandwich.

This of course being a strategy to gain an endorsement with a sandwich company giving Enrique free sandwiches for the rest of his life. Alas, his strategy fell apart when Hero was misinterpreted worldwide as a love song.

Such an ironic tragedy considering there has never been a greater love than the love between man and sandwich.

Let’s analyze the lyrics and uncover the true meaning of Enrique’s Hero. The song is sung from the perspective of the sandwich.

Stanza 1:

Would you dance if I asked you dance?

This is the little wiggle happy dance you would do in a chair while eating a sandwich.

Or would you run and never look back

Never regret eating a sandwich

Would you cry if you saw me crying?

A crying sandwich means it’s all soggy and ruined from condiment overload and is a valid reason to cry.

And would you save my soul tonight?

After you eat the sandwich it wants to make sure its soul is safe with you for all eternity.

That’s only the first stanza and already you’re probably incredibly embarrassed for ever thinking this song wasn’t about a sandwich.

Stanza 2:

Would you tremble if I touched your lips?

The bliss of that first bite

Or would you laugh? Oh please tell me this

The euphoria while chewing that first bite

Now would you die for the one you love?

This is a reasonable response to a good sandwich

Oh hold me in your arms tonight

Don’t put that sandwich back on the plate

Chorus:

I can be your hero baby

I’m your sandwich, lil infant.

I can kiss away the pain

I can cure your hunger pangs

I will stand by you forever

You’re never gonna lose these extra calories

You can take my breath away

I don’t know the Heimlich Maneuver

At this point we’re only 1 minute and 20 seconds into the song and it is incredibly clear that Enrique was passionately singing about his love of sandwiches. I don’t think we need to belabor the point by going through the rest of the song, you can handle that on your own if you so wish to do so.

Upon its release Hero topped charts in the United States, England, Australia and other countries around the world. In the United States it reentered the top 10 a year after its release becoming the first song ever to do so. The song has maintained popularity over the past two decades by being featured in movies and TV shows such as Smallville, Hot Tub Time Machine, Scrubs, Glee, Hinter Gittern and many more. Sadly, all of these references used the song out of context focusing on the romantic ideal of being a savior/ protector.

It has been almost 20 years since the debut of Hero and one can’t help but think about how many free sandwiches Enrique Iglesias has missed out on at this point. In 2018 Enrique Iglesias and Anna Kournikova sold their mansion in Bay Point, Miami. Considering I haven’t done any research into what they have been up to since then one can’t help but wonder maybe Enrique reached his breaking point and now travels the world for the greatest sandwiches this planet has to offer.