There is no greater horror than the dark imagination of the human mind. The modern graphics in video games can be so realistic that you can see the pores on a character’s face. The gore and blood is so realistic that it leaves nothing to the imagination. In this way modern day video games are no different than the news or anything else you can look up on the internet. All these reports that the media covers of video games being too violent are missing the most macabre perpetrators of devilish delights. If you truly want to see violence in video games then we must go to the past. Games such as Super Mario, Mega Man and the dark truths of Tetris.
Super Mario took the world by storm during its introduction with the original Nintendo System in 1983. At the time, video games were a pretty new concept. Minimal trails had been blazed in regard to storylines and Nintendo chose to move forward with an Italian Plumber looking to save a princess from a monster turtle. This bold choice turned into a massive success and was embraced by the entire world. The ‘violent’ Call of Duty games have people play as military men/ women shooting each other. And yet, in 1983, Nintendo had all of us roleplay as a blue-collar worker whose preferred method of murder was crushing the spine of his opponents by jumping onto their heads. Can you imagine the agony of the goomba being crushed to death in such a way and then your entire body disappears into oblivion only for this plumber to rob you of your coins so your family is left with nothing.
This is where the rabbit hole of Super Mario begins. Like a Lovecraftian tale it left us to fill in the blanks on our own. You’ve successful reached World 7 as Mario the Plumber. The princess is only one world away from being saved. The game tricks you into focusing on your progress. So close to your goal. From left side of the screen to the right side, keep moving forward. Not for a second do you think about your past. Six entire worlds left in ruin and carnage due to your unwavering pursuit of a woman you barely know. Why do you pursue her? Because she’s a princess? Marie Antoinette was a princess and the French saw the evil she represented and cut off her head at the guillotine. “Let them eat cake.” Where’s your cake Mario? Based on the barren worlds left behind, Mario’s cake is genocide.
Mario is a blue collar worker, he’s one of us. Is Nintendo saying we all have this carnage inside us ready to be unleashed. Eat the mushroom, let your bloodlust grow!
How does wife Goomba ever financially recover after Mario the Plumber jumped on the head of husband Goomba, the sole bread winner of the family? He sits in the corner in his wheelchair a vegetable or shell of the man he used to be, he has no arms and thanks to Mario his legs don’t work. Wife Goomba has to find a way to support all her Goomba children and so has no choice but to follow Bowser in his many attempts to thwart Mario the Plumber. Through all the Super Mario games, through Mario 64, Sunshine, Galaxy and Odyssey, wife Goomba has no option but to encourage her Goomba children to enroll in Bowser’s child Goomba army. Systematically all of her children got their spines crushed by the plumber or were eaten by Yoshi his dinosaur. Now at home, wife Goomba cares for her paralyzed husband and children struggling to get by and well aware that a day will come when she wont have enough food to feed everyone.
Mainstream media, tell me more about how all these shootings games are too violent. These modern day games are a child’s attempt at terror, sloppily done in crayon and abandoned halfway to take a nap after consuming nine juice boxes.
Mega Man, first released in 1987 is about a futuristic robot who must fight on behalf of humanity against robots rebelling against the system. We play as and praise this Benedict Arnold for standing up for our fleshy cause and not standing with his brethren as he goes from level to level squashing robot rebellion. An important note of Mega Man is after he beats a robot boss he gains their powers. This perfectly mirrors the thought process of cannibal tribes. There are cannibal tribes that believe if they eat you they gain your knowledge and skills. Mega Man seems to be cut from the same clothe. The Mega Man series has been healthy and consistent for decades releasing dozens of titles but they can only end in one of two ways. Either Mega Man rids the world of rebellious robots for all of us to live safely or he takes all this power he has accumulated over the past decades and uses it to become a robot god to rule us all.
“Video games are too violent you can cut off someone’s head in that terrible game!” Well, since 1987 the media has not been discussing Mega Man’s rise to supremacy so I’m concerned about the lack of consistency.
In 1984 Russian software engineer Alexey Pajitnov published Tetris. Since then Tetris has gone on to be one of the biggest selling video game franchises of all time. Whether intentional or not Alexey created one of the greatest villains our world has ever seen: the straight line block. Similar to how Ghengis Khan would wipe out entire cities to intimidate neighboring nations, the straight line block wipes out entire populations of blocks in a single swoop. Everyone is having a great time co-existing and then all of a sudden the suicidal bomber straight line block makes it like no one even existed at all. Tetris in itself is a lose lose game. There are two choices in Tetris. Either eliminate every block on the screen or let over population suffocate everyone so we all die in the end anyways. The second you hit the start button you’re choosing to pick your poison. Tetris is the philosophical trolley problem but even if you choose the many over the few you the many will be doomed in mere moments anyways.
Some people find violence and horror staring at the barrel of a gun pressed to their forward. I find horror in the thick darkness of a dungeon. Vague sounds of scurrying critters living their lives. Then piercing the rhythmic silence is an optimistic voice of murder, “It’ssa a me, Mario.”
