There is a very well-known fact that’s taught in assuming every classroom around the world. A universal truth that is shared and disseminated by all with no educational boundaries like culture or religion. Zeus, Odin, Yahweh and Jesus all agree that Koala fingerprints are almost identical to human fingerprints.
Everybody knows this and it comes as no surprise but through painstaking hours of procrastination I have dove headfirst down this rabbit hole (up the koala tree?) to see what this seemingly innocent fact means for society and the shape of the future as we know it.
The Illuminati and Free Masons are real and they are comprised and ruled by koalas.
In an age rampant with crime dramas not once has there been a detective that dusted for fingerprints that led to a koala murderer. Nor has a koala ever been a suspect! How is this possible if humans and koalas share fingerprints? Simple, humans aren’t in control of the narrative.
Do you think it’s a coincidence the British Empire sent their convicted criminals to Australia? Or did they know Australia is where the animal kingdom already sent their criminals? Look at the face of a koala. The nose extend so far down that there is barely an upper limit. Now imagine a human wanted to mimic this look and you get the Hitler mustache. Wake up, people! Where do you think Hitler learned warfare?
The Great Emu War of 1932
As the name implies the war was fought bravely between emus and humans. These veterans from World War 1, armed with guns lost a war to emus in the Australian countryside. The commander of the human forces, Major G.P.W. Meredith had this to say:
“If we had a military division with the bullet-carrying capacity of these birds it would face any army in the world…. They can face machine guns with the invulnerability of tanks. They are like Zulus whom even dum-dum bullets could not stop.”
Major Meredith as well as military historians seem to omit a crucial question from their recordings of this war. If you equate an emu to a tank you still need a driver.
Did you know scientists want us to believe koalas can sleep up to 20 hours a day? I’m no scientist but is it really sleeping or is it plotting beyond anything we can imagine? The discipline of 20 hours of plotting, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year equals over 7,000 hours of plotting per koala annually. Considering koalas can live up to 18 years that means a single koala can plot for around 130,000 hours in its life. In the Art of War Sun Tzu states, ‘every battle is won or lost before it is even fought’
The assassination of Archduke Ferdinand or JFK. The rise of Genghis Khan and the Mongols wiping out 17% of the human population. The divine winds that saved Japan from a joint Korea China invasion. The stock market crash of 1929, the following great depression. The invasion of William the Conqueror in 1066 leading to what we know as modern day Britain, the same Britain that thought it was a good idea to send criminals to Australia. The Donner Party. Hatfields Vs McCoys. Rorke’s Drift. The fall of Goddamn Rome.
Wheels within wheels turning to the mechanisms of the koala agenda. I fear for what the koalas have in store for us.
According to a graph I found online and did not fact check the koala population was on a decline leading into the 1700’s but saw rapid growth for centuries leading into the 1950s. Aligning with the rise and the dying flame of the British Empire through both World Wars. In 1940 at the House of Commons Winston Churchill rallied a nation with his speech:
“Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory there is no survival.”
It is not clear whether this quote was about koalas or Nazis but facts don’t lie. Koala population has been on the decline since.
The current theory is World War 2 was actually an extension of two koala factions tearing their species into a long drawn out civil war. Did Churchill know about this civil war or somehow help instigate it? We don’t know. But we do know that during the Arcadia Conference of 1941 Churchill petitioned the US to focus on the European war front. Essentially abandoning Australia to the wrath of the Japanese. Interesting….
The economic and scientific boom in human society after World War 2 is proof that koalas were distracted with their internal struggles so innocent, helpless humans finally had time to prosper. Based on the modern media it seems dark times are upon us again and we must all prepare for a koala wrath the likes of which this planet has never seen.
They share our fingerprints, people! They share our fingerprints!